I want too much, she thought. I want everything. I want day and night, sleeping and waking, world without end, amen. Someone warned her once that it was fatal to tell a man you loved him. ‘What I really want,’ she said, ‘deep down, is stillness, safety. The feeling you’d always be there. I love you. I think I must have loved you without knowing it all my life.’
im so depressed today i feel like i cant move and my whole body is aching but no i need to suck it up and go to work for 10 hours rip
its making me sad bc im definitely not living my life to the fullest or being the person i wish to be and i deserve better than to just work a shit job all the time and not have any time for myself and for th people but at the same time i also need this job so i can have money to do things and buy myself nice things that make me happy so what do i do 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
i need to phone into work again just to let them know im still sick and i’m literally so anxious i feel like throwing up
at the company i work for there is a rule you cant be sick more than 3 times in 12 months which is literally bullshit and i had a food posioning yesterday and i’m feeling so weak not to even mention how i feel mentally and the last thing i feel like i should do is go to work for 10 hours and stand on my feed the whole day but i’ve already been sick once and me calling in sick again would literally mean i can only get ill once before january 2019 (which is quite hard also for someone with somatization of symptoms every time my mental health gets bad but i bet u they wont give a shit about that) anyway i’m calling in sick because its so against my values to prioritize work (when i can afford to) over mental and physical health but i’m so mad
i called in sick now and the manager in started interrogating me how bad is it and if i’m aware this is my second time being ill and i know its her job kinda but also can u give me a break this i was already feeling shit about calling in sick and this gave me so much more anxiety about it i just need to look after my health ok?
at the company i work for there is a rule you cant be sick more than 3 times in 12 months which is literally bullshit and i had a food posioning yesterday and i’m feeling so weak not to even mention how i feel mentally and the last thing i feel like i should do is go to work for 10 hours and stand on my feed the whole day but i’ve already been sick once and me calling in sick again would literally mean i can only get ill once before january 2019 (which is quite hard also for someone with somatization of symptoms every time my mental health gets bad but i bet u they wont give a shit about that) anyway i’m calling in sick because its so against my values to prioritize work (when i can afford to) over mental and physical health but i’m so mad
i’m an actual trash i hate to be that gf that gets insecure right away when her bf is away with his friends and having fun with other people i’m really not proud of it but he also definitely doesnt help me make feel better
look at me sabotaging my relationship for literally no reason other than my insecurities based on zero factual evidence
I’m home for 2 weeks and it’s only been a couple of days so far but I already miss my bf and all he ever talks about is how nice it is having time to catch up playing play station and going out with his friends 🙂
Can anyone who has seen the new black mirror tell me if theres any episodes i shouldnt watch as someone with ocd that could send me in doubts over reality / life being a simulation / just a dream / not real etc.? I know its a very difficult question to ask people who don’t experience it first hand but just like if u could tell me what episodes have that kind of topic?
i really want to watch it but im scared i dont want it to trigger my ocd doubting reality is seriously the scariest shit and i dont need any supportive arguments for my intrusive thoughts
darknesstohislight 