me – Page 21 – darknesstohislight

cooking style: i no longer know what a responsible amount of garlic is

dear universe;

hello. i am writing to let you know you did good job on the stars, and also on dogs.

yours respectfully,
me

mydogsnokes:

i’ll take my chance with aliens before i mess w/ whatever is at the bottom of the ocean

stevenjackie:

Rach, maybe your resolution should be to gossip less.

magnezone:

bae: texts back 20 minutes later

me: responds instantly to make it clear at least one of us is grown

sharingneedles:

boy: (stops texting me)
me: (texts other boy ive been ignoring for a few weeks) hey haha sorry i was busy what’s up

*guy ignores me*
me: jus wait till my selfies drop

sovietunions:

one thing i never do is write a rough draft it’s all or nothing go big or go home

soufflesandbowties:

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”